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On My Road to Heaven:
A Bold and Joyful Life

 

Ozzie Delgadillo has studied in MSIA for over 45 years. He shares many of his experiences in his new book, “On My Road to Heaven: A Bold and Joyful Life.” Please enjoy these three excerpts from Ozzie’s book, now available at onmyroadtoheaven.com.


Gudrun’s Brush with Death

In 1987, Gudrun and I had been together for 20 years. I was talking to John-Roger, my spiritual teacher. He said something like, “Well, Ozzie, your relationship with Gudrun ended four years ago. What you came in to do together completed then.”

I said, “But I never wanted to leave her.”

He said, “You always loved each other, and you will always love each other, but that relationship needs to change because the karma is coming in where you’re going to need to be with somebody else. She is going to need to be with somebody else, and there’s going to be a split. But it doesn’t mean that you are going to stop loving each other.”

Even though we still loved each other a lot, Gudrun and I were in the process of breaking up our relationship. It was over. The time had come to go our own ways.

In 1989, she went to Germany for a while to be with her family who lived there. While she was out of the country, she fell ill with a severe abdominal infection. This was pretty serious. She went to the hospital in Sigmaringen, the same city where her sister lived. She phoned me from the hospital and asked me to call our spiritual teacher to tell him what was going on. She was very ill. They told her she had to have an operation or she would die. But she insisted she didn’t want the operation until I was able to talk to our spiritual teacher.

I immediately phoned John-Roger and left him a message. He returned my call, telling me to get on a plane immediately. He told me to go to the hospital and stand at the foot of her bed touching or holding her feet. “Just touch both feet, that’s all.”

I left as quickly as I could. When I arrived at the hospital, a bunch of doctors were around her bed. Gudrun’s sister was also a doctor, an anesthesiologist. You can imagine that when the doctors saw me, they wondered, Who is this guy? This guy comes all the way from America, but is he a doctor? She says she doesn’t want us to operate on her, but she’s dying. I could see the puzzled looks on their faces.

I came into the room in a nonchalant way and said, “Hi,” to her. She was in really bad shape. I said a prayer we learned in our church. Then all I did was just touch both feet. I just put my hands on them for only a few seconds. Next, I took my hands away. Immediately after I touched her feet, she opened her eyes and spoke, “How are you? How are you doing?”

I said, “I’m fine. I came here to see you.” We talked a little more, and then I left her room.

As I was leaving, one of the doctors followed me out the door and asked, “What did you do?”

“Oh, I just touched her feet.”

“Oh, come on.”

“Well, I said a little prayer. You know, we believe in God, and we believe that God is the one who does the healing. I know you’re a doctor, but the one actually doing the healing is God. I said a prayer, and I guess God heard it, and she’s coming back. That’s all I did. I guess she wasn’t supposed to be dying, anyway.”

“But that’s impossible. You know, she has a serious internal infection. You can’t ignore the infection, and she didn’t want us to touch her at all.”

I said, “I wouldn’t be too concerned about the infec—”

“How can you say ‘don’t be concerned with the infection’!”

I assured him, “Don’t be concerned. She’s going to be fine. She’ll be all right.”

The doctor was walking with me and said, “What do you practice?”

“Well, nothing, really. You know, when people are sick, we just say some prayers. And that’s what you saw here. That’s it. She’s going to be well. She’s actually well already. It won’t be long before she’s walking out of here and going to her sister’s house.”

He said, “I’ve never seen this before in my life. I still cannot believe it.”

I said, “Well, I guess there can be a first time, and this is your first time for this.” I left. And, of course, she recovered.


J-R Opens My Heart

I had already been studying in MSIA quite a while. There was a lot of emphasis on loving in John-Roger’s teachings. I had an expectation of what spirit was and what loving was. Yet I always felt that I was a hard, tough son of a bitch. I felt like an outsider in our group as I lived my rough life out in the world. I saw people expressing their loving very freely and openly. They demonstrated it in a very emotional way. I asked myself, Why can’t I feel that? I judged myself that I was not doing it. I was still searching for that feeling, for that intimacy, and to identify myself with the loving. I was just not feeling it.

During one of our large events, I was sitting in a group of two or three hundred people. John-Roger was sitting in front. I just looked at John-Roger and started wondering inside of myself, What’s going on with me? All of a sudden, I started to walk toward John-Roger. I said, “John-Roger . . . J-R, what’s going on with me?”

He said, “What?”

“I don’t feel this loving.”

“Well, what are you doing?”

“I don’t know. I don’t know. I see everybody so loving and so emotional, but I don’t feel anything like that. I really don’t.”

“Well, come over here.”

I came close to him. He pulled me even closer. Then he took his open hand and hit it firmly against my heart. He said, “Now take this and go give it away.”

I mumbled, “Uh . . . ” I didn’t know what to do. I wondered, Go give it away? Then I started to cry like a baby. I was lost. I turned around, and I asked myself, Give it away? Now? Which way do I go? I found a friend sitting down. I was crying like a baby. She held me really tight and asked, “How are you doing?”

“I don’t know.” I needed somebody to comfort me. I was lost.

She kept hugging me and asked again, “How’re you doing?” I told her the story. She said, “Ozzie, you’re a loving guy. Ozzie, come on. What are you talking about? You’re a loving guy.”

“Oh, I didn’t think so.” When I told her what J-R had done to me, she started laughing. I stayed awhile and we laughed together.

I was thinking that love should be a certain way, that it couldn’t be just, “Hi, how are you?” and then you shake their hand. Love can be shown in so many ways, but I was expecting something super special, as if I should be floating in the air. That was just a fantasy. I had been shown love in so many different ways, but I did not recognize it, so I was judging myself.

After that, I really felt good. J-R had just looked at me like, “Ozzie, what is the concern? Come on, Ozzie, all that stuff is fantasy.” I was not living up to my fantasy, which was a big illusion anyway. And all along, I had been expressing my loving in so many ways. I didn’t have to be walking on the cloud. J-R was telling me, “Ozzie, that’s bullshit. That’s not how it is. You’ve been loving all your life, and you just haven’t recognized it for what it is.”


How Do You Create a Universe?

In the earlier years of our spiritual group, our teacher, John-Roger, had more time to spend with us personally. One time, I asked, “J-R, how about we have dinner at your place, and I’ll take care of all the food?”

He said, “Hey, great! Talk to my staff and see when we can get that on the schedule. Sure, we’ll do it.”

I said, “Wonderful.” I checked with one of the fellows who took care of the appointments, “Hey, I talked to John-Roger, and he said ‘Yeah, let’s do the dinner.’”

The staff person said, “Oh, great, Ozzie. Good food?”

I said, “Yeah, good food.” My son Eric was with me most of the time, like a piece of chewing gum attached to me. He was about 14 at that time. I knew a really good Mexican cook. I told him, “Listen, I’m gonna need a dinner to go, for about 10 people. What do you suggest?”

“What about goat barbeque? You know, with Mexican people, it’s a big hit!”

“That’s great!” I said. Later, we picked it up and drove up to Mandeville Canyon, where John-Roger lived. We arrived with a big stainless steel bucket, filled with food. We also had plenty of tortillas, chilies, and onions. It was everything that John-Roger doesn’t eat, but I didn’t know about that at the time. All of his staff was there. We warmed it up on the stove. Eric took care of the tortillas. I served the food and was watching John-Roger. I told him, “It’s goat barbeque.” I loved it! It had a great sauce. Delicious. It had everything you need for a hell of a good time.

I don’t know if J-R tasted it. He probably did taste it. I don’t know if he really went for it. The staff didn’t say anything. I know they ate some. And there was a lot of happiness, joy, and laughter. Eric helped to clean up afterward. After that, I was sitting in the kitchen, and then John-Roger moved around behind my chair. He put his hands on my shoulder. I felt an energy from him transmitting so much love. I just asked him, “J-R, are you taking me all the way to where we are supposed to go?”

“Yeah, Ozzie, I’m taking you all the way.”

“Thank you, J-R.”

“That’s OK. Don’t mention it.” I realize some readers might not know what this means. It doesn’t matter, but it was, and still is, a really big deal to me. Some of you will know exactly what that meant.

From there, we moved to the front of the house where he had a small entry way with a little love seat and a chair. It was very cozy. It was getting a bit late now. We had been talking for a while. It was dark outside. Eric started to fall asleep with his head on my shoulder. J-R was sitting on one of the benches. I asked him, “J-R, you talk about universes, and you talk about all this fantastic stuff that’s taking place in the other dimensions. And you mention something about creating universes, and that the Mystical Traveler can do that kinda stuff. How do you create a universe?”

He replied, “Oh, Ozzie, it’s simple.” All of a sudden I was up in the sky—way up! I was among the stars, thousands of stars. The color of the sky was a beautiful dark blue, but there was plenty of light. J-R and I were dressed in long purple gowns. As he was talking to me, we were floating in the air. There was no movement. We were just standing up in the sky. Everywhere I looked—upward, downward, sideways—there was just sky and stars everywhere. Then he said, “Look, Ozzie.” He took his left hand in his right hand and said, “I pull a piece of a hangnail. I take it in my right hand, and I swirl it into space.”

Then he just threw the hangnail out. It traveled off like a little spark. And then, way far away, there was an explosion of light. I was just looking at it. He said, “See, Ozzie, that’s how we create a universe. We create a universe, and you know what, Ozzie? Once it is created, then we’ll send Eric, your son, and he will be the Mystical Traveler of that place.”

All of a sudden, we were sitting down again in the small space. It was quiet. He didn’t say anything. There was nothing to say. Eric was totally asleep. I said, “You know J-R, it’s getting a bit late. I gotta take Eric home to bed.”

“Yeah, you’d better take him home.”

“J-R, thank you very much for everything.”

He said, “Hey, thank you for the dinner, and all that stuff.” The catering gear was already in bags, so we just loaded them in the car. I got Eric into the car and drove him home. That was a night with the Traveler, my spiritual teacher. What an honor.

4 thoughts on “On My Road to Heaven: <br>A Bold and Joyful Life”

  1. Ozzie was such a Love – sooooo full of Spirit and Joy! I highly recommend this book – you’ll feel his Joy and Loving pouring right through it!!! Highly recommended!!!

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