In teaching flexibility, you teach your children how to win and lose. When they really know how to lose a game gracefully, they'll always be winners. Losing one game won't destroy their confidence or self-esteem. They'll handle it and go on to the next thing.

If one sister or brother is purposefully teasing or annoying another, teach the other that he or she does not have to allow that. Teach the child that it is possible to walk away from the situation and go somewhere else. We do this as adults. If we are in an irritating situation, we can ask others to change their approach. We can tell them we don't like their expression, and why. And if that doesn't work, we can either put up with it or leave. Teach your children the same choices.

Sometimes children let their imaginations run away with them. They "see" all sorts of frightening things in their imagination and then carry the fear out into this existence. Then you have screaming children on your hands for no apparent reasons. Explain to them how the imagination works. Explain to them that they create these pictures and images, and that they can create happy pictures if they want. Play imagination games with them. Teach them how to imagine beautiful things. Teach them how to change scary images into funny ones. If they see a monster chasing them, teach them to alter that monster into a very tiny monster and see him running off a cliff while they stand safely behind a tree and watch. It's easy to teach them to change these images.

If something happens to your child that is physically frightening or upsetting, teach the child to work with the imagination to change the image. If the youngster sees the family dog get hit by a car, take some time to sit with the child, and give him or her the image of the dog running safely past the car down the street. Consciously the child will know that the dog was hit; the basic self will release that "horror picture" of the dog being hit, however, and the child will feel better.

Take the opportunity of walking your child to bed, tucking her under the covers, and spending some time talking, as a loving privilege for both of you. You might ask, "What did you do today that you'd like to do tomorrow?" Or, "What is it that you did today that you don't want to do tomorrow?" If you ask those questions with love and interest, your child's answers may surprise and delight you. This loving process can also assist your child in letting go of any disturbances of the day, setting up a clean slate for a positive experience tomorrow.

An important part of loving is to establish guidelines and help your children stick to them.

One of the most important times for children is right before they go to sleep. Others are the mornings when they awaken and their mealtimes. If you just make the effort to express loving consideration during those periods, you will be doing much to support the growth of a loving human being.

You can give yourself and your child leeway to go through the ups and downs of the learning process. You child is just beginning to grow and learn, and, believe it or not, you are not finished with your learning, either. You can learn on both the outer and inner levels throughout your life. Since you are the most experienced one, you are in charge for a short time -- in charge of directing, stimulating, encouraging, urging, disciplining, and, at all times, loving your child.

Part of loving a child is to create an atmosphere of freedom and to teach the child that with freedom comes responsibility. Part of loving is also to provide the child with what is needed to develop her own loving heart. Sometimes that is called discipline, which may produce the freedom to be more loving in a happy household. Good habits can be taught, and loving choices can be encouraged.

It is so important to allow each consciousness, each Soul, the freedom to evolve into its own awareness in its own timing.